I'm Looking Through You
by thatoneguywholikesyogurt16
Summary: It's been nearly three months since Aizen's defeat, and Ichigo should be finally content with his life. He's back home with his family, living like a normal teenager. But, there's something missing. When he realizes what it is, he'll do anything to get it back. IchiRuki some slight IchiHime, but it's not really romantic, more or less just a literary tool. Anyway, enjoy my story! :D
1. Solitude

**I'm Looking Through You**

_**Chapter One: Solitude**_

The essence of cherry blossoms flowed through the air as he reluctantly looked up to the blue sky. Clouds were scattered here and there, but otherwise it was a fantastic, sunny day. He watched with a scowl as everyone around him was enjoying the weather, enjoying themselves. Oh, how he envied them.

But, Ichigo's days lately were anything but enjoyable, the last week he has felt lonelier than ever before. At first he couldn't figure out what it was, it wasn't the loss of his Soul Reaper powers. Ichigo was relieved to finally be able to live a normal life, without the constant burden of being aware of the supernatural.

He just couldn't seem to figure it out. The emptiness was made by the loss of something else, something that he couldn't seem to live without. Whatever it was, it sure did rub Ichigo the wrong way. And everyone knew.

"Sooo…Ichigo", a voice said to him, his thoughts interrupted as he looked over to where the voice came from. And of course it was Keigo. "when are you gonna get over Rukia? Or are you just going to sulk around all the time?"

Ichigo's eyes narrowed, 'That's it!' he thought to himself. 'But…I couldn't he couldn't miss Rukia, that's just' he cringed at the thought, 'Weird.' But then a flourishing of memories went through his mind, and Ichigo realized it was indeed true.

The main memories that hit him where it counts were of her holding a juice box with a confused, but determined expression staring back at him. Or looking to the now vacant seat to the right of his desk where she would draw all those crappy drawings she liked doodle, making an expression of self-pride every time she completed one. And most importantly, the day he first looked into her eyes, the day he first became a Soul Reaper.

The aching in his heart sent a tremor that reverberated to his very core. All he could do was sulk. She wasn't dead, but she mind as well had been. The accompaniment of his friends only made him want her more; he would never be the same without _her_ by his side.

Right then, he realized how much Rukia really meant to him. He couldn't help but feel stupid, he wasted almost 3 years, 3 years dammit.

After everything that happened, he was expected to forget, as if it had never even occurred. The thought made his blood boil, his eyes jerk open, and his chest hurt. If only he realized how much she meant to him, before she dissipated before his eyes.

But it wasn't just the loss of his companion that troubled Ichigo, he now realized it did include the loss of his Soul Reaper abilities. He couldn't even sense a hint of spiritual pressure, nor is he able to battle Hollows. He couldn't see any souls, and he couldn't see Soul Reapers, which meant…..no Rukia.

The only remnant of his past abilities was the Substitute Soul Reaper badge that now resembled nothing more than a useless piece of wood. 'No, the badge wasn't useless, I'm useless,' he thought to himself, 'and unable to protect anyone I care about.' It truly made him hate himself.

Suddenly Ichigo was plunged back into reality due to the persistent bantering of his friend Keigo, "…Ichigo. Ichigo! Oh come on! Are you even listening to what I'm saying?! You've been such a space cadet lately!", hollered Keigo, with a frustrated look on his face.

Ichigo looked back towards his friend, a scowl still prominent on his face. "Sorry about that...I was lost in thought", he muttered quietly, before looking back off of the rooftop, then returning his gaze to Keigo, doing his best to try to and look interested in what his obnoxious friend had to tell him, "What were you saying?"

Keigo grimaced and cried, "Oh forget it!", and fell to his knees and pulled at Ichigo's shirt, then continues, "Why doesn't anyone listen to me?! Why?! why….", before collapsing to the ground in a cloud of dust.

Ichigo barely paid any attention to Keigo, it was his daily routine. He looked over to his friend Uryu, who was walking towards him to ask, "Hey Ichigo, are you going to eat that or just hold it in your hand?" Ichigo looked down at the sandwich in his hand, completely forgetting that it was there.

"Oh, right.. Yeah, I am, I'm just savoring every bite." He replied, chuckling slightly, before proceeding to take a bite of his food.

Uryu gave him a quizzical look and said, "Well, while you're at it you should quit the brooding you're doing. It's really dulling the air around here."

Ichigo's scowl deepened and he retorted, "I'm not brooding dammit!"

Uryu smirked, "Could've fooled me." He replied, which was followed by a scoff from Ichigo.

Mizuiro agreed with Uryu by saying, "You're definitely brooding , Ichigo." Uryu made a subtle giggle and said, "He doesn't even have to look up from his phone to notice."

Mizuiro made a snicker, still staring at his phone.

"Okay, maybe I am brooding. It's not like it's any of your business Uryu." Ichigo countered.

"Well, sorry I was concerned then. It's just really annoying seeing someone in such a horrible mood on a day like this." He said, gazing up at the blue sky.

Ichigo made a bewildered face, and asked "Since when are you the 'sunshiney hippity hoppity' type guy? You're the most eccentric out of everyone here to be honest."

Uryu glowered at the remark, and shouted "What's that supposed to mean?" clinching his fists.

Ichigo laughed at how offended Uryu was, "Now look who's getting all flustered."

All the sudden, Uryu's neck stiffened and he whispered to Ichigo, "Duty calls, I'll be back in a bit."

Ichigo watched as he ran over to Chad and Orihime and whispered something to them before they all bolted down the roof access; he knew they were going to fight a hollow.

Mizuiro looked up from his phone to pay attention to Keigo's overly-exaggerated performance, and he nonchalantly mumbled "Mr. Asano, you're doing _it_ again." But his words held no value to Keigo's pleas of attention.

He rolled his eyes, and looked back down to Keigo. "We need to work on our History project anyways, unless you think that we're going to be accomplishing something with you flailing yourself around on the ground, I suggest we go and actually work on it."

Keigo reluctantly picked himself up along with a few whimpers. Mizuiro glanced over at Ichigo, and said "You can come along if you want. It isn't too nice being up here alone, it's pretty depressing to say the least." He forced a slight chuckle to try and lighten the atmosphere.

Ichigo's scowl had ceased to be replaced by a small smirk, and replied "I appreciate the offer, but I'll be fine up here," he paused and turned away from them, "Thanks for the consideration."

Mizuiro looked at his gloomy friend, and sighed, and said, "If that's what you want then", he then turned on his heel and ushered Keigo to follow. Ichigo was left alone on the rooftop, staring off into space…

He heard the door to the roof close, and Ichigo slightly eased onto an air conditioning unit. But he still felt someone's presence on the roof. As if he expected someone to be there, he glanced in the direction of it. However, to his dismay he only saw his bare and empty surroundings. He looked back down to the ground in shame before slamming his fist into the air conditioner and cursing.

Ichigo stayed in that position for at least ten minutes, he then muttered under his breath, "It isn't the same without you, Rukia..." Looking back in the direction of where he felt the presence, "I will regain my powers, and when I do…" He never finished his sentence, a few seconds later the lunch bell rang.

He very slowly gathered himself and left the rooftop, his scowl replaced by an expression of insentience. A pair of violet eyes watched him make his way to the roof access door, before narrowing as he slammed it shut behind him…


	2. Purpose

**Disclaimer: As sad as it is, I do not own the rights to Bleach. Tite Kubo does. This is only merely a fanfiction.**

**I'm Looking Through You**

_**Chapter One: Solitude**_

The essence of cherry blossoms flowed through the air as he reluctantly looked up to the blue sky. Clouds were scattered here and there, but otherwise it was a fantastic, sunny day. He watched with a scowl as everyone around him was enjoying the weather, enjoying themselves. Oh, how he envied them.

But, Ichigo's days lately were anything but enjoyable, the last week he has felt lonelier than ever before. At first he couldn't figure out what it was, it wasn't the loss of his Soul Reaper powers. Ichigo was relieved to finally be able to live a normal life, without the constant burden of being aware of the supernatural.

He just couldn't seem to figure it out. The emptiness was made by the loss of something else, something that he couldn't seem to live without. Whatever it was, it sure did rub Ichigo the wrong way. And everyone knew.

"Sooo…Ichigo", a voice said to him, his thoughts interrupted as he looked over to where the voice came from. And of course it was Keigo. "when are you gonna get over Rukia? Or are you just going to sulk around all the time?"

Ichigo's eyes narrowed, 'That's it!' he thought to himself. 'But…I couldn't he couldn't miss Rukia, that's just' he cringed at the thought, 'Weird.' But then a flourishing of memories went through his mind, and Ichigo realized it was indeed true.

The main memories that hit him where it counts were of her holding a juice box with a confused, but determined expression staring back at him. Or looking to the now vacant seat to the right of his desk where she would draw all those crappy drawings she liked doodle, making an expression of self-pride every time she completed one. And most importantly, the day he first looked into her eyes, the day he first became a Soul Reaper.

The aching in his heart sent a tremor that reverberated to his very core. All he could do was sulk. She wasn't dead, but she mind as well had been. The accompaniment of his friends only made him want her more; he would never be the same without _her_ by his side.

Right then, he realized how much Rukia really meant to him. He couldn't help but feel stupid, he wasted almost 3 years, 3 years dammit.

After everything that happened, he was expected to forget, as if it had never even occurred. The thought made his blood boil, his eyes jerk open, and his chest hurt. If only he realized how much she meant to him, before she dissipated before his eyes.

But it wasn't just the loss of his companion that troubled Ichigo, he now realized it did include the loss of his Soul Reaper abilities. He couldn't even sense a hint of spiritual pressure, nor is he able to battle Hollows. He couldn't see any souls, and he couldn't see Soul Reapers, which meant…..no Rukia.

The only remnant of his past abilities was the Substitute Soul Reaper badge that now resembled nothing more than a useless piece of wood. 'No, the badge wasn't useless, I'm useless,' he thought to himself, 'and unable to protect anyone I care about.' It truly made him hate himself.

Suddenly Ichigo was plunged back into reality due to the persistent bantering of his friend Keigo, "…Ichigo. Ichigo! Oh come on! Are you even listening to what I'm saying?! You've been such a space cadet lately!", hollered Keigo, with a frustrated look on his face.

Ichigo looked back towards his friend, a scowl still prominent on his face. "Sorry about that...I was lost in thought", he muttered quietly, before looking back off of the rooftop, then returning his gaze to Keigo, doing his best to try to and look interested in what his obnoxious friend had to tell him, "What were you saying?"

Keigo grimaced and cried, "Oh forget it!", and fell to his knees and pulled at Ichigo's shirt, then continues, "Why doesn't anyone listen to me?! Why?! why….", before collapsing to the ground in a cloud of dust.

Ichigo barely paid any attention to Keigo, it was his daily routine. He looked over to his friend Uryu, who was walking towards him to ask, "Hey Ichigo, are you going to eat that or just hold it in your hand?" Ichigo looked down at the sandwich in his hand, completely forgetting that it was there.

"Oh, right.. Yeah, I am, I'm just savoring every bite." He replied, chuckling slightly, before proceeding to take a bite of his food.

Uryu gave him a quizzical look and said, "Well, while you're at it you should quit the brooding you're doing. It's really dulling the air around here."

Ichigo's scowl deepened and he retorted, "I'm not brooding dammit!"

Uryu smirked, "Could've fooled me." He replied, which was followed by a scoff from Ichigo.

Mizuiro agreed with Uryu by saying, "You're definitely brooding , Ichigo." Uryu made a subtle giggle and said, "He doesn't even have to look up from his phone to notice."

Mizuiro made a snicker, still staring at his phone.

"Okay, maybe I am brooding. It's not like it's any of your business Uryu." Ichigo countered.

"Well, sorry I was concerned then. It's just really annoying seeing someone in such a horrible mood on a day like this." He said, gazing up at the blue sky.

Ichigo made a bewildered face, and asked "Since when are you the 'sunshiney hippity hoppity' type guy? You're the most eccentric out of everyone here to be honest."

Uryu glowered at the remark, and shouted "What's that supposed to mean?" clinching his fists.

Ichigo laughed at how offended Uryu was, "Now look who's getting all flustered."

All the sudden, Uryu's neck stiffened and he whispered to Ichigo, "Duty calls, I'll be back in a bit."

Ichigo watched as he ran over to Chad and Orihime and whispered something to them before they all bolted down the roof access; he knew they were going to fight a hollow.

Mizuiro looked up from his phone to pay attention to Keigo's overly-exaggerated performance, and he nonchalantly mumbled "Mr. Asano, you're doing _it_ again." But his words held no value to Keigo's pleas of attention.

He rolled his eyes, and looked back down to Keigo. "We need to work on our History project anyways, unless you think that we're going to be accomplishing something with you flailing yourself around on the ground, I suggest we go and actually work on it."

Keigo reluctantly picked himself up along with a few whimpers. Mizuiro glanced over at Ichigo, and said "You can come along if you want. It isn't too nice being up here alone, it's pretty depressing to say the least." He forced a slight chuckle to try and lighten the atmosphere.

Ichigo's scowl had ceased to be replaced by a small smirk, and replied "I appreciate the offer, but I'll be fine up here," he paused and turned away from them, "Thanks for the consideration."

Mizuiro looked at his gloomy friend, and sighed, and said, "If that's what you want then", he then turned on his heel and ushered Keigo to follow. Ichigo was left alone on the rooftop, staring off into space…

He heard the door to the roof close, and Ichigo slightly eased onto an air conditioning unit. But he still felt someone's presence on the roof. As if he expected someone to be there, he glanced in the direction of it. However, to his dismay he only saw his bare and empty surroundings. He looked back down to the ground in shame before slamming his fist into the air conditioner and cursing.

Ichigo stayed in that position for at least ten minutes, he then muttered under his breath, "It isn't the same without you, Rukia..." Looking back in the direction of where he felt the presence, "I will regain my powers, and when I do…" He never finished his sentence, a few seconds later the lunch bell rang.

He very slowly gathered himself and left the rooftop, his scowl replaced by an expression of insentience. A pair of violet eyes watched him make his way to the roof access door, before narrowing as he slammed it shut behind him…


	3. Reminiscing

**Hiya everyone, since school has started I haven't had a whole lot of time to write, but I do acknowledge all of your follows, reviews, and favorites. And I just wanted to thank you for the appreciation, it means a lot. :D *cries tears of joy***

**Also, I encourage anyone out there to start writing themselves, I'm nothing special to be honest and I'm sure there's people out there with much brighter ideas then what I have come up with. I will add further chapters to this, but they will come with time. I can't really commit to a schedule at the moment, but there WILL be further additions.**

**And one last thing, I've been writing this story so far while listening to The Beatles, hence the name of the story. ;D**

**So if anyone listens to music to accompany the overall vibe of the story, I'd recommend classic Beatles song. Mostly love songs, lol.**

**Anyway, you guys are fucking awesome, and enjoy this chapter! :DDD**

* * *

><p><strong>I'm Looking Through You<strong>

_**Chapter Three: Reminiscing**_

After Ichigo left Orihime's, he started on his way to his own home. As he approached the riverbank, he stopped to look at the flow of the water. It comforted him, to watch the current of the river.

Ichigo crawled into his room through the window and then collapsed onto his bed, relieved to be home. Luckily, his family had already gone to sleep, so he didn't have to deal with his dad's surprise attacks on him.

To Ichigo's disappointment, he still had homework to do. With a growl, he plopped into his desk and got out his History project. He chose to not have a partner, for obvious reasons.

As he opened up a drawer to get out a writing utensil, he came across a photo from his photo-booth lying face down over his pencils and pens. Intrigued, he picked it up and flipped it over. His eyes grew big, and a smile grew on his lips.

It was a picture of him and Rukia, back when he first became a Soul Reaper. She was making the most surprised expression, she had never seen a camera before, the flash really caught her off guard. He remembered the day as if it was yesterday…

_ "…Ichigo! Are you going to go or not?!" yelled Keigo, looking aggravated. Ichigo cocked his head towards him._

"_Yeah, give me a second, I have to get Rukia. I'll be back in a sec." He responded, running off towards the direction of the trees._

_Rukia was sitting up on a branch, drawing some rabbits. Her tongue was sticking out in concentration, her pencils squiggling and squeaking on the paper as she progressed._

_With a concluding scribble, she made a, "Hmpf" and put the drawing away in her bag, before leaning back on the tree. As soon as she felt completely relaxed, a voice shattered her short-lived bliss, "RUKIA!"_

_Rukia jumped in fright, and fell out of the tree shrieking. She closed her eyes, preparing herself for the fall. But to her surprise, she never fell. Instead two strong arms wrapped around her, catching her just in time. _

_She opened her eyes and saw two stern-looking amber ones looking down at her, "That was real smart, Rukia! You're lucky I was around to catch you or you'd have killed yourself!" Ichigo said loudly, with a concerned look on his face._

_Jumping out of his arms, Rukia retorted, "It was your entire fault I fell in the first place fool, you startled me!" Ichigo let out a chuckle, dismissing Rukia's response._

"_Anyways, how about you come with Keigo, Mizuiro, and I to the mall?" He asked her, then continued, "Keigo invited me to come along, and I thought you might enjoy it." His face showed optimism._

_Rukia made a skeptical look, "What is this, 'mall', you speak of?" Ichigo sighed in annoyance and explained it to her. She seemed to understand, but was still cautious as to accept the invitation._

_Ichigo, almost on queue added, "We can still keep an eye on Hollows, but honestly I don't think there's going to be any around. It's pretty calm lately." Rukia's expression relaxed slightly._

"_I suppose you're right, and this would be an opportunity to become more acquainted with The World of the Living's lifestyle" She said calmly, before adding, "but we better not let our guard down. You never know when a Hollow could appear."_

_Ichigo nodded in agreement before saying, "Well, we need to get going. I told Keigo to wait for me so I could come get you."_

"_Right." She said. After dusting some dirt off her skirt, they started on their way back towards the front of the school. For being short, Rukia was exceptionally fast. It kinda shocked Ichigo._

_When they arrived, Keigo waved towards them and ushered them over. "C'mon! We're going to miss the transit!" he said frantically, and they all ran towards the bus stop. It wasn't as far away as Rukia thought it would be._

_ Relieved, Keigo said "We didn't miss it, thank god." He then added, "Oh yeah, and Mizuiro will be meeting us at the mall, I guess he's on a date or something." Ichigo and Rukia nodded in acknowledgement. _

_Within a few minutes, the bus arrived and they boarded. Keigo went first, as he was paying everyone's fare. As Ichigo and Rukia got on, he directed her to sit down next him and Keigo. It was a ten minute ride, but Rukia seemed to enjoy it, which put Ichigo at ease._

_After they got off and entered the mall, Keigo took the lead of the group and said, "Ok, we've got to wait over by the cafeteria for Mizuiro, what do you guys feel like…" he looked back at Rukia and Ichigo and they had disappeared. "Huh?! Oh c'mon!" he yelled._

_As soon as Ichigo and Rukia entered, Ichigo grabbed her hand and they took off running. Keigo didn't seem to notice, it made Ichigo smirk._

"_Ichigo! What are you doing?!" Rukia exclaimed, looking at her partner with utter confusion. _

_Ichigo returned the gaze and replied, "What's it look like? I'm taking you to the fun spots. If we were going to hang out with Keigo the whole time he would've just started being annoying and you would've hardly enjoyed yourself. Besides, he's got Mizuiro to keep him company."_

"_Hey what the-", Rukia said as Ichigo suddenly came to a halt outside a place that read, 'Land of Arcadia'. "What kind of place is this?" she asked, bewildered at how dark it looked inside._

_Ichigo smirked, "You'll see" he said, and he guided her in. As they entered, Rukia was not impressed in the slightest, and Ichigo realized she probably didn't have any idea at all as to what this place was._

"_This place is where you go to play video games, see?" he said, then pointed his finger at a kid who appeared to be about twelve, who was actively engaged in a racing game._

_Rukia, still looking the least bit interested, uttered a "Hmph." Ichigo then scoffed, and said "Okay, I'll show you. Come over this way."_

_As he was guiding her to his usual game of choice, all the sudden Rukia stopped dead in her tracks. Ichigo, looked back in confusion, "Rukia, it's over he-", he stopped talking._

_Rukia's previously blank expression was replaced by amazement and delight. Ichigo followed her gaze to the game he despised the most. 'Blast Off Bunnies: The Quest for Carrot Cake Mountain', he internally screamed._

"_ICchigo! I wanna play that one! It looks sooo cuuuuuutee!" she practically shouted, Ichigo glared at her._

"_Are you serious?! That's ridiculous!" he retorted, completely embarrassed at Rukia's request. But she refused to budge, and Ichigo reluctantly complied._

_Overjoyed, Rukia ran to the machine, nearly knocking over other people in her wake. "Okay" Ichigo said, inserting some quarters into the machine._

"_So what you have to do to play this game is use this joystick here" he put his hand on it and then directed his other to the red buttons that were on the opposite side, "and use these to use your boost and jump abilities."_

_As Ichigo explained and demonstrated the game, she stared at him. When Ichigo looked up, he caught her gaze. Her concentration was completely on Ichigo, with a slight smirk relevant on her face. _

_He held it for a second, before quickly averting it back towards the machine and slightly blushing. "S-so, do you think you can handle this?" he asked, looking at her. Rukia nodded affirmatively. Ichigo put the fifty cents in to start another turn and Rukia shoved him out of the way._

_She did pretty well, and after about 5 turns she turned to Ichigo and said "That was actually quite fun! So, what other marvelous places are there here?" with an interested expression. Ichigo smirked at Rukia's sudden change of character._

'_That's odd. She's actually enjoying herself, instead of being 'Miss Serious Soul Reaper'', he thought to himself, before responding to her question, "Well, how about we find out?" They then left, and started on their way to another area._

_After walking for about 5 minutes, and stopping here and there to explain the purpose of shops that came to interest, they came across a photo booth. "Hey Ichigo, what's that thing?" she asked, Ichigo walked towards it and spread the curtain. She looked inside with a skeptical expression, "Is it some sort of eating area?"_

_Ichigo laughed at her, she glared and kicked him in the shin. "Hey!" he exclaimed, grabbing his leg in frustration. "That hurt dammit!" She smirked at his pain._

"_No. You don't eat in it, it's a photo booth." He said, still with a pained expression._

_She looked at him with concern, "…a foh-toe booth…?" Ichigo grimaced, and explained what a photo booth was. She understood, and seemed to be interested._

"_Well,how about that then?" she asked, looking at the booth. Ichigo nodded and opened the curtain before ushering her inside._

"_It takes 5 pictures. Are you ready?" he said, getting the money out of his wallet to pay. _

"_Of course. Proceed." She said with complete seriousness. He looked at her funny; she returned the look and asked, "What? Am I doing something wrong?"_

_Ichigo replied while inserting the money, "Well no, not really. It's just when someone gets their picture taken they usually smile, that's all."_

"_Oh, I see. My apologies." She said, feeling a bit awkward. Ichigo saw her expression._

"_Hey. There's nothing to be sorry about." He said, chuckling. "Just have fun. That's all you have to do." With that he stuck out his tongue and crossed his eyes and looked towards the camera._

_A bright flash startled Rukia, but she then realized it was the camera and smiled. She looked over to Ichigo with a pleased expression, and another flash illuminated the booth accompanied by Rukia's laughter at Ichigo's provocative faces._

Ichigo's flashback was interrupted by a fly landing on his nose. Ichigo swatted at it in frustration, and scowled at the insect. It got away, which made his scowl deepen.

He set the photo down, got up out of his desk chair, and stretched. He reluctantly sat back down at his desk, even though his bed seemed more appealing. 'I need to work dammit. I can't afford to take another missing assignment.' With that, Ichigo jumped back into his schoolwork.

After he finished, it was about two in the morning. He yawned, and leaned back in his chair. Glancing at his desk, he caught sight of the photo again, which triggered interest.

Picking the photo back up, he focused immediately on Rukia's smiling face in the photo. With his finger, he traced the outline of hair, and gazed into her violet irises. But his moment of content ended with lethargy from staying up so late.

Reluctantly, Ichigo got ready for bed, but before he dozed off, the recurring thought of a certain someone made a smile grow on his lips. With ease, he fell asleep.


End file.
